Up early, scrolling through my phone, I came across this smiling face. Remembering that my nephew looked at me with all that sweet, innocent joy shifted my grumpy, why-am-I-awake-right-now energy. I am already ready for more time with A3.
P.S.: Azelynn, Ariah, and Azariah initials are A.M. It delights me that "am," the present tense first-person singular of "be," is an actual word. (I love when names and even initials have meaning.) Also, for whatever reason, this morning their initials made me think of a song by CeCe Winans I used to sing as a little girl.
"I am that I am. I'm all that you need. I can; yes, I can. No, it ain't too hard for me. Do you know? Really know? Do you really believe? Every day, every night of your life, I am."
The song is based on a passage of scripture that most of us who grew up in church read or heard. Moses, after being told his assignment, had a couple of questions for God.
1. Why me? Exodus 3:11
2. Who are You? Exodus 3:14
I think it is interesting that Moses posed the second question as though from the perspective of those who would question on whose authority he presented. I imagine that he himself wanted to know. "What is Your name?" "What should I call You?"
It is a simple, practical question. "The God of your father" is a description, and it feels impersonal and distant. If it were sufficient, Moses would not have had to pose the question. And, from what I read, he was not scolded for asking this particular thing.
Scripture says "God said unto Moses, I AM THAT I AM..." (Other versions read "I AM WHO I AM.") Then God proceeds to tell Moses how to describe Him to the people of Israel.
It actually feels like a flippant response. If you ask me for my name, and I tell you, "I am who I am," you'd probably be annoyed. (Perhaps, it is just me.) Moses is a person tasked with returning somewhere he fled, with his marred history and feelings of inadequacy, for what seems like an impossible mission. "I am who I am" initially reads like condescension.
However, it must have been exactly what Moses needed. He did not press for a different answer on this topic. From what I read, Moses, understandably so in my opinion, has rebuttals when necessary.
Perhaps Moses needed big, capitalize-the-G, God energy. (I am not being irreverent here even if it reads that way.) Given a dangerous, huge assignment against a powerful entity with limited resources and abilities, Moses probably needed something reassuring to recall during the inevitable difficult moments.
Remember, he did not have scripture to pull from. He could not quote verses in Psalms to encourage himself. "I AM has sent me." "I AM is with me." That feels encouraging, comforting, and empowering.
I think it is most interesting that God tells Moses the name He (God) prefers to be called "forever," (Exodus 3:15) and still gave Moses the "I AM THAT I AM" response. It feels tailored for Moses. It feels personal.
I do not really have a point here. I am just awake, thinking, and writing. Happy Friday!
