Favorite Quotes
“If growing up is painful for the Southern Black girl, being aware of her displacement is the rust on the razor that threatens the throat. It is an unnecessary insult.”
"Be the change you wish to see in the world."
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
"...I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you; we are in charge of our attitudes."
“There is nothing more rare, nor more beautiful, than a woman being unapologetically herself; comfortable in her perfect imperfection. To me, that is the true essence of beauty.”
“Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.”
Sunday, April 18, 2021
Amgleshia Is Smarter Than Me
When we were children, she was my best friend. We fought...physically fought. I have a tattoo on my inner arm. Underneath the word "amor" is a feather-shaped scar. Amgleshia and I had a fight in the driveway near Solomon's car. The car's antenna was broken. Somehow, I stabbed my arm on the broken antenna. When I look down and see the scar with literal love overlapping it, I think of her. More than fight, I remember sitting in the gravel hugging and crying afterwards.
Amgleshia is braver than me.
I read Harry Potter at 28. She read it when we were children. She read lots of books. She was a good student. Like I said, she is smarter than me. I remember when our paths first started to diverge. She was dripped in perfect chocolate skin. A shape and curves found her while chubbiness clung to me. She could run and joined track. She could dance and joined Flashes. Boys noticed her. This shy, quiet, beautiful girl was shedding her shell. I was so damn jealous. I was so damn proud.
Amgleshia is stronger than me.
People who do not know her have their opinions. Hell, even us who know her well have had things to say. We see a single black woman with five children and say and think all the accusing things people say and think of each other. Either we do not know or forgot about the little black girl who was willing to fight a man for her mother; the little black girl who was fought and cut down by her mother; the little black girl who was othered by her father. Perhaps, even if we knew every single detail of her life, our judgements would still be final...
Amgleshia is more resilient than me.
She heard them. She lived with the disappointment others while managing her own. She had to two choices: fight like hell or break without recovery. She's been fighting like hell every day of her life, so she did what she knows best. She does what she knows best. She rebelled. She chose to fight like hell, bend beyond capacity, and refuse to break. She has been bombarded with abuses, insults, dislike, contempt, rumors, and disparagement. She has to nurture, provide, guide, survive and repeat. She has to balance black womanhood with single motherhood and stretch herself beyond capacity every single damn day.
Amgleshia is no different from me.
We are from the same town and family. Our childhoods and memories overlap. We were each other's first best friends. We slept in the same bed, borrowed clothes, buried secrets, fought each other, and been willing to fight for each other. We are not the same girls who fought in the driveway over only God know what. Time and physical distance has created literal and figurative space between us. This space has provided perspective for me. Amgleshia is no different from me...except that she is smarter, braver, stronger, and more resilient.