I cannot decode Fear. He was there when I took leaps that were ultimately reckless, devastating falls. He was there when leaping gave way to soaring. He coursed my insides as I learned that leaps can be beautiful, life-affirming, and neccessary. Back again, Fear is neither threatening nor disarming, and I wonder if He is affirmation or warning.
...Though it doesn't really matter.
I have lost faith in Fear, and I no longer trust Intuition, Logic, or Peace. I am not fearless. It is not instinctual. It may never make sense. And, I experience doubt and confusion every step of the way. But...When I reach the ledge, nothing will stop me from leaping. Fear will be there; He will course my insides like only He can. And, I will know this is a reckless, devastating fall and beautiful and life-affirming and neccessary.