It is likely my own depravity activating compassion. It maybe rooted in egocentricity, but I root for your absolution. Your forgiveness is my solution to get from underneath this shame because I know that if you change, I am not required to stay the same. It's strange how I'm drawing parallels between society and self and seeing myself connected to it all. I'm neither root nor cause. I'm human, and I am trying. And, if my interpretation of the text is correct, God dwells in me although I am shaped in iniquity. My mind cannot wrap itself around this dichotomy, so it calls it hypocrisy. Ashamed of who I was and afraid to be who I'm meant to be, I stagger in the present overwhelmed by the variety, choices upon choices. Freewill makes one ill, but freewill makes one free. To paraphrase the revolutionist, for me it's death or liberty. Am I dying? Or am I free? It depends on one's perspective, and the world is fucking gray. Everything is subjective. I'm hypothesizing, not prophesying; the words are from LeKechia, not God. But if I am His, isn't my being God's will and as intentional as the Earth herself? If I am created in His image, haven't I been powerful since birth with purpose upon purpose? I'm certain of few things. I have more questions than answers. None of this shit is simple. I am learning to live with these intricacies. If I am too complex for my understanding, how can I expect to demystify The One who created me?
