Favorite Quotes

“If growing up is painful for the Southern Black girl, being aware of her displacement is the rust on the razor that threatens the throat. It is an unnecessary insult.”

"Be the change you wish to see in the world."

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”

"...I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you; we are in charge of our attitudes."

“There is nothing more rare, nor more beautiful, than a woman being unapologetically herself; comfortable in her perfect imperfection. To me, that is the true essence of beauty.”

“Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.”

Sunday, January 25, 2015

Low-Maintenance

My dad once told Kevin that among other things I was "low-maintenance." I know he meant no harm; he was actually saying that it was something favorable for my husband. I was, however, offended when he said it. (And, I called him out on it. Lol.) It sounded more like an insult than a compliment to me, but he had a valid point.

I am rather simple. I own four pair of shoes; three of them are from Payless. I am not big on brands. I don't care for purses. I don't wear make-up nor do I know how to apply it. I am doing something "different" if I wear mascara. I shop out of necessity not enjoyment. I prefer sleeping over primping. When I want my lips to "pop," I add extra coats of lip balm. I am, as my dad put it, low-maintenance, and with the exception of a few phases in my life, I've always been this way.

There are many, millions, of beautiful, well-dressed, trendy, made-up women who are "slaying" fabulous. Shout out to them! It works for them, and I love it. I wouldn't dare suggest that they change a thing. However, women like me are often viewed as if we're in some sort of crisis that needs immediate attention, and others are constantly trying to change us. Clearly, our bare faces, lackluster attire, and missing accessories are evidence of something gone horribly wrong on the inside. Lol. 

Folks, please stop the madness! 

If I may speak on the behalf of low-maintenance women everywhere who are tired of people trying to "help" them:
The suggestions about how we can "improve" our appearance when unsolicited are not needed. The make-up advice is wasted on us. We like our hair styles just fine, and we'll change them when we want to.  No, we don't want to try that whatever it is. And, we'd appreciate it if you all would calm the freak down and stop trying "fix" us. We understand that most of you mean no harm, but the crap is annoying. 

Femininity is subjective. Let me be feminine my way, and you be feminine your way. Beauty is subjective. Respect my beauty as I respect your beauty. Low maintenance, high maintenance, or somewhere in between, in my opinion, none of it is either right or wrong. It's right if it's for you. It's wrong if it isn't.

To all of my fellow low maintenance women being this way isn't bad or weird. In an era that celebrates superficial beauty, it takes courage to confidently rock a bear face and whatever hairstyle, clothes, and accessories that best express who you are.