Show Up

Some people fear, dislike, do not want, and/or are uncomfortable with your presence in the room...a room...any room they are in. So what? Show up anyways. Shine always. Maybe you won't change their perspective, but your presence sure as hell challenges their misconceptions. Maybe that's the real work. Show up and let your unapologetic existence speak for you. -LeKechia Lyshell

Reconciliation

"Stay the same and broken
or change to be whole."
She looked herself in the eyes
and heeded the wisdom of her soul.
Her highest self told her current self
"You've been low too long.
You wailed over poor decisions
and grieved losses and love.
You wallowed in pity;
you cursed the rock, hard place, and mud.
Enough is enough. What's did is done.
You've reviewed the past;
revision is in moving on."
She complimented her resilience
and recognized her for living
through many, many inner hells.
She thanked her for not quitting
when depression and suicide hailed.
She offered her grace and forgiveness;
she reconciled with herself.
-LeKechia Lyshell

My second favorite shirt

I've had many good days in this yellow shirt. Today was one of them. It's survived time and weight fluctuations. It's my second favorite shirt. 💛💛💛

Adulting

I bought this so I could prove myself wrong. Lol! I adulted so well today.

No Incentives Needed

A few months ago I had one of the most enlightening conversations with an acquaintance. She, unlike me, grew up without any exposure to religion. I am Christian; she is Agnostic. She said "I just don't think people should have to have an incentive to be decent, kind, and non-assholes." I agree. Love, kindness, compassion, sympathy, empathy, and generosity should not have be incentivized in order for people to freely give/show them to other people. Hopefully we will get there one day. Maybe our connectedness as members of the human race, regardless of nationality, ethnicity, race, gender, sexual orientation, socioeconomic status, etcetera, will suffice, and we will be "decent, kind, non-assholes" to one another, no incentives needed. Until that day, let's not forget what separates "sheeps and goats."

P.S.:
The fact that over 70% of Americans identify as Christians blows my mind. I wonder what our nation would be like if over 70% of Americans believed in and practiced Matthew 22:36-40. I know I am guilty of incongruity and hypocrisy. I have to do better.

The way we treat people matters.

"Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Enter, you who are blessed by my Father! Take what’s coming to you in this kingdom. It’s been ready for you since the world’s foundation. And here’s why: I was hungry and you fed me, I was thirsty and you gave me a drink, I was homeless and you gave me a room, I was shivering and you gave me clothes, I was sick and you stopped to visit, I was in prison and you came to me.' 'Then those 'sheep' are going to say, 'Master, what are you talking about? When did we ever see you hungry and feed you, thirsty and give you a drink? And when did we ever see you sick or in prison and come to you?' Then the King will say, 'I'm telling the solemn truth: Whenever you did one of these things to someone overlooked or ignored, that was me—you did it to me.'"  Matthew 25:34‭-‬40 MSG

We're Going To Need More Wine

This book has made me laugh aloud and uncontrollably. (Chapters 6 and 11 😂) It has made me sob with understanding, empathy, and sympathy. It has made me exclaim: "Yes! She fucking gets it! Thank God she included that!" I've had revelations. I've been challenged. This read has most certainly been like a needed conversation with a good friend. Gabrielle Union, thank you! ❤
P.S.
I haven't finished it yet. When I love a book, I prolong the read not wanting it to end.

Unstoppable

She hated her job and went to work.
She lost her religion still attending church.
She smiled when she wanted to cry.
She lived while considering suicide.
She stood courageous being stoned by shame.
She kept her head despite mental pain.
Have you saw the internal mountains she's moved?
Have you heard about the demons slayed?
Yes. She is powerful and so fucking brave.
She took breaths when life suffocated her lungs.
Watch her. Witness the woman she is bound to become.

I know so many resilient women. I am a resilient woman. Shout out to us! ❤

Father's Day 2018

Because I know there are so many people who have mixed to unpleasant feelings about their dads, I wanted to share this. It was heavy on me today. The man in this photo is my step-dad. He and my mom, at one point, had a beautiful, loving marriage. He and my mom also had a toxic, unhealthy marriage. Today, he and mom are no longer married, and I am happy about that. In all cases, my brothers and I witnessed it all. My stepdad and I are no longer close, but as evidenced by this photo, there was a time I absolutely adored him. No one, not even me and I have tried, can convince me it was not mutual and authentic. There were times he said hurtful things no parent should ever say to a child, and I said highly disrespectful things that should never be said to a parent. There are painful experiences in our relationship that took a lot of time, introspection, and forgiveness to move past. Now we are not forced to interact with one another. We don't have to, but we still occasionally call or text each other to make sure the other knows he/she is loved. Anthony taught me things that make me a better human. He taught me things about family, culture, individuality, society, and life that I cannot disregard or discard and have no desire to. I am who I am because my father is Lee and my stepfather is Anthony. I cannot be unshaped by my father or stepfather, and I do not wish to be. I believe with everything in me that all of my experiences with these two men, good or bad, make me more equipped for my destiny. So today I called my stepdad and told him "Happy Father's Day" simply because my relation to him impacts who I am. While I am a work in progress, I like who I am and who I am becoming. Denying my fathers' impact on my being creates a form of inner chaos and dysfunction.

For those with strained father relationships, be encouraged. Forgiveness is possible even if a relationship is unlikely or undesired. I think forgiveness for our parents grows us in ways that are shockingly freeing.

Here's The Thing #1

A special individual recently suggested I consider that "the most unique thought a person can have is that he/she is not so unique." Our conversation so helped my perspective. In my personal life walk, I have "othered" myself from others. I made myself an outcast for a lot of negative, self-disparaging reasons and self-imposed bullshit. I was fully immersed in feeling damnableness that lead to shame, isolation, a lack of transparency with those I care about, and many fucking awful days of feelings like complete and utter shit.

Here's the thing. What if the things you are beating yourself up for are not uncommon? What if there are other people walking this Earth who have taken similar paths, made similar choices, and/or had to face similar beyond-their-control events? What if there are other people who think the thoughts you think? What if someone else shares your experience? Are they fucked up beyond repair? Hopeless? Unique?  Or, like you, are they human, perfectly capable of redemption and forgiveness, able to rise above shit (self-imposed, genetic-imposed, and environment-imposed) and live life true to their highest selves?

I am not unique. There is not an area of life experience that I stand alone in without a single person, living or dead, to know what it is like. The same is true for you. You are not unique, and I mean this with good will and the best intention.

Sometimes the darkness is so incredibly dark because there is no one there to tell you "Hey, stop worrying so much. You can overcome this. Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Know that nothing you have done is beyond Love's scope. I've been there. I've only recently left there. I am there right now. There's hope. Take my hand. Let's prove that connectedness lights up the darkest places."

Find your community. Build your tribe. Get out of self. Know that it gets better. Know that you are definitely not alone!

Dear Friend:
Thank you for taking my hand and challenging and shifting my perspective.